Sunday, September 25, 2011

26 & 3

Just a number, right?

For many, yes. But for me? This marked the beginning of the end of the pregnancy with Elisa. I sat there in church this morning and looked at my baby girls hand as she held mine. And looked at the tiny dimples there. Dimples that I rejoiced over when they first started appearing, telling me that she was gaining weight. And I almost cried. Knowing where we are now, but remembering how unsure we were that this day would even come.

It's only natural that I would approach this day with some apprehension.

And the day is not yet over, but I am still at home, and I did not need to visit the hospital today. So good. The first of many milestones is almost over. In 3 more weeks I hope to enter uncharted territory. That of being further in a pregnancy than I've ever gone.

I'm not sure yet how I really feel about so far "passing" today. Numb? Unsure? Just putting one foot in front of the other really. Sort of like walking a balance beam. Slow and steady, making sure to know where my foot is landing before putting weight on it.

To others...our journey shows the faithfulness of God. Some may ask, well how do you figure? I figure..because my girl is here. And healthy. But above all she is HERE. All those fears and shattered dreams that became my life at this point with her no longer bear any weight with her. To look at her now, you'd never know how scary her beginning was. You'd never know the miracle she is. Small...but looks, acts, and developmentally is like any other almost 2 year old.

Even if this one decides to come early...I can only wish for another outcome just like her.

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