Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Thanks, Kid!

So what can I say? Shrimp has definitely found the bladder. Apparently, Shrimp is resting on my bladder and causing a very unique sensation. And since it seems like every symptom in the book can possibly be a sign of pre-term labor, it had me calling my doc who, thankfully, informed me it is just Shrimp laying on the bladder. This early. I have 15 more weeks of Shrimp laying on the bladder. Thanks, Kid!!

Which leads me onto another point. I am thrilled to be expecting Shrimp. Absolutely thrilled. That being said, I can do without the pregnancy part. In fact, if there was a way to just wake up in January and Shrimp is here, safe and sound, I'd be tickled pink. While my pregnancy has in a myriad of ways been a very good pregnancy, I've struggled with many of the symptoms. I think most of them stem from my absolute terror of something going wrong. I can't seem to determine the difference between a normal pregnancy symptom and a sign of something worse. So I worry about every new feeling/pain/symptom. It also leads me to be afraid to bond with Shrimp as I'm afraid that once I do, something will happen and the pain of losing Shrimp will be worse. It's like I can't completely reconcile the fact that this pregnancy has not and will not fail. I keep telling myself that once Shrimp is here and I no longer have to worry about my body failing me, it will be ok. But will it? I may be able to control my body better than I can the circumstances of life that will soon face Shrimp. But, I don't know, at least it wouldn't be because my body is a failure.

On a positive note, I took an evening tonight to rest. I've been feeling pretty puny for a few weeks with allergy type symptoms. This week, it appears to have escalated and my head really feels like it's going to explode and I'm so exhausted that my current evenings plans consist of writing this and then going to bed. Yes, at 730 at night. But my point was, I was able to, as I was relaxing tonight, watch Shrimp in my belly. I could see Shrimp stretch, kick, push against my side. It is the most indescribable feeling to see that and just leaves me in awe. The one thing I absolutely love about being pregnant is being able to see these kind of things. I just wish they made home ultrasound machines so I could actually physically see Shrimp as well, rather than just seeing my tummy move. But that being said, that could lead to a dangerous obsession with watching the screen instead of going on with life, lol!

Shrimp is now 25 weeks. That means there are only 15 weeks to go until d-day. Only 3 weeks to go until I'm considered to be in the third trimester. Here's where Shrimp is at now:

Head to heels, your baby now measures about 13.5 inches. Her weight - a pound and a half - isn't much more than the average rutabaga, but she's beginning to exchange her long, lean look for some baby fat. As she does, her wrinkled skin will begin to smooth out and she'll start to look more and more like a newborn. She's also growing more hair - and if you could see it, you'd now be able to discern it's color and texture.

Nighty night! Hopefully next week I'll have a much more positive post. Darn hormones. :)

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