Monday, October 6, 2008

Stop and listen to the music

Stop and listen to the music. It has been too long since I’ve listened to the words and melodies of many songs for the pure enjoyment of listening. Too much time has been spent “working” as I try to commit the words and melodies to memories, or trying to learn new skills, hear new things or allow my creative juices to flow. Now, while that is definitely a useful, worthwhile and enjoyable task to me, there is just something to be said about sitting back and letting it flow through you and touch your soul. Something about music tends to reach to places that you didn’t even know you had.

Being off this last week, I think I’ve realized something. As it is with the music, I’ve realized that I’ve spent so much of my time and my life trying to accomplish all the various tasks that I have on my plate. Whether it be a task for my job, cleaning my house, cooking dinner, running the various errands, working on new music, participating and worshipping at church, I’ve just been busy. I haven’t found the enjoyment from these tasks as I would have thought I should. They were just “tasks,” things to have been gotten through. I’ve read it over and over about the benefit of taking time to stop and smell the roses, but I don’t think I’ve realized really how big of a benefit there is in there. It’s also been said over and over that throughout all our busyness, we have forgotten the most important things in our lives….our families. Now, our (Andrew’s and mine) family may just really consist of each other at the moment, but we have not been giving each other the time that we really should be. I know that even if I am at home, I am still working, checking e-mail, stressing over something that I couldn’t get to – to the point that I can’t let go. That, in combination with everything else, I have managed to bring myself to the brink of complete and total emotional breakdown. I have to ask, is all this “busyness” really worth it? Am I really fulfilling my purpose for my life? If I’m not, how can I possibly expect to learn of my purpose if I’m too busy to listen to the One who gave me purpose?

In order to put things right again, I must, absolutely must, regain direction. Instead of tasks to fill up the hours, I need to be silent and hear His voice. Maybe take a walk in silence – or even with my music, as a time of pure relaxation and listening to His voice. I never feel closer to God than when I am just listening to the words He has given to others to share. I must learn to do this more often.

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