Letter to my daughter - August 15, 2013

Dear E,

I'll be honest with you.  I'm not sure what I am going to say or where I am going to go with this.  But I want you to know one thing beyond a doubt when you look back on this years from now.  Maybe I'm gone, maybe I'm still here.  Maybe you are looking at your own daughter or son and wondering what you were like when you were that age.  But I want you to know one simple thing.

I love you.

I may not love every single thing about you.  I may not love you at every moment.  Like the times you come up to me and scream in my face because I told you no.  Or the times you hit your brother.  Or the times you deliberately cross a line and watch me as you do, just so you can see if you get a reaction.

At those times I may want to just walk away and scream myself.

But I still love you.  And always will.

You and I, we will always clash our wills.  You see, you are just like me.  In temperament, in tenacity, in stubbornness.   And someday you and I both will be thankful for that.

But right now, I'll cringe as you yet again refuse your nap, or yank a toy from your brother, or scream in the hallway right outside your brother's room as he sleeps.

And I'll treasure the moments you come up to me and tell me you love me.  Or crawl into my lap while I'm working just to be with me.  Or demand that I take a picture of your car.

Seems like it was just yesterday we had our first fight, as you were determined to come into this world well before it was your time and I was just as determined to make sure you stayed put.  There will be many more to come.

To see more Letters to our daughters by other bloggers, click here.

Lots of upcoming challenges

In an effort to resurrect my blogging and combine it with my photography hobby, looks like I will be participating in a few "blogging circles."  So stay tuned...

In case you haven't been keeping up with me on facebook or g+, here are a few of my recent snapshots of our life.

A month of fun

I have to admit that I have stunk at blogging recently.  I'm pretty sure it's due to a couple of reasons.  1.  I have a new creative outlet, photography and 2. It's been just THAT crazy.

I won't promise to get better.  I doubt I could hold up that end of the bargain.  But I know I need to get back into the "swing" of getting my life on "paper."  Since I don't keep baby books, or journals, or anything like that.  I will need this to remember, 50 years from now, what life was like when we were small.

We just got back from our 2nd annual trek to see the balloons at my aunt's in Michigan.  It was awesome, we had a great time.  Even more fun than last year it seems.  We were older, more able to take in the sights and sounds and stay up later and truly enjoy all the activity.  It was a jam packed weekend full of balloons, boats, family and even trains!  I won't go into too much detail, and instead will let the photos tell the story. 

There comes a point

In every boy's life when he must face the inevitable.

That of the first haircut.

I expected him to be a bit more freaked out, but he handled it like a trooper.  Didn't shed one tear.  Instead just gave his daddy what his Aunt Jamee frequently refers to as the "stink eye."

I'm not sure what it is, but this haircut makes him seem much less like my "baby" any more.  He sure is growing up fast.

The end result.

18 months later (and then some)

It seems like just yesterday that you entered this world and made your presence QUITE known.  You may not have been as dramatic as your sister but you sure weren't quiet.

Oh how we fought in the beginning.  You always knew just what you wanted and who you wanted it from.   I didn't understand or appreciate that side of you being so independent myself and wanting my child to be independent as well.   You just knew you wanted your momma and you wanted to make sure I knew it.

Those very things that caused us to be such adversaries in the beginning are just what endears you to me now.

I love how I can ask you for a hug and you run to my arms and throw yours around my neck.

I love how I can ask you for a kiss and you smack a big wide open wet one right on my lips.

I love how you call out just for a glimpse of me or just to give me a smile.

I love how the moment I sit on the floor to play with you, you drop everything just to come sit in my lap.  And lay your head back on my shoulder.

I even love (in some ways anyway) how you just want me to stand in the room with you until you fall asleep.  How just my presence somehow gives you peace.

At 18 months you finally weigh about the same as your sister.  28 lb 1 oz, 34 3/4 inches tall.  You run with your arms at your shoulders.  You giggle at just about anything.  You say mama, dada, ball, truck, car, dog, block, water, hot dog.  You grab our hand and pull us to the item you desire.  You constantly put your cars into the ball popper and then come to us with tears sheening in your eyes and point to the cars and beg for us to get them back out.

My baby you will always be.  Somehow, it will be harder to let you go to school.  You have so endeared yourself to me in a way I didn't know you could.

Love you baby boy.

Beauty

Ever since developing this hobby, I see the world in a different way. 

 Everywhere I look, I see vibrant color, and beauty. 

The fall of the sun on hair, the glint of the light in an eye that is gone almost as fast as it started.  And I want to capture it for all time.

I don't do it justice, yet.  But I hope to one day.