Thick blood

Check it out. Does this not sound like me or what?

http://www.jigsawhealth.com/articles/thick-blood.html

Can explain my history of stomach issues, eh???

Late May update :)

Wow ok so a month has gone by. I know I haven't posted. But what a crazy month it has been. And unfortunately, nothing I have to report is good news. I don't know how else to say it. I'm trying to see positive in everything, but sometimes it just gets hard.

So, Andrew is constantly on the patrol for a teaching position. He has applied in many places and has had several interviews. Unfortunately, we haven't heard back from 1 (it was a prelim interview almost 2 months ago and principals were supposed to start calling from that list!) and the other two decided on other candidates. So he decided to look into his interview skills and went to a few coaches and has done gobs of research on line. So he's well versed in interviewing now! Please pray for us that he finds the right position for him. We are a bit frustrated as it seems like this is just harder than we thought it would be.

Then on top of that, Andrew was driving around in his truck the last few days and suddenly some error lights started popping up. As they didn't go away, he decided to have someone take a look at it. And lo and behold, at the ripe old age of 10 years with 170k miles on the truck, looks like the transmission is failing. Joy oh joy. We were kind of hoping to drive the wheels (literally) off of the thing. It's been a great truck, but now we are stuck with the possibility of finding something to replace it with and that's just a bit disheartening.

And last but not least, we are sad to report that we have recently suffered our second miscarraige. BUT on the positive side of this, I am finally going to get the medical attention I should have. So far, they have run a battery of tests and referred me to a fertility specialist. From the tests they have run so far, they find that I have a higher than normal number of cardiolipids. My understanding (although I have been unable to verify this by googling. Google has failed me on this one!!) is that my blood clots too much and is probably "thick" and this can lead to miscarraiges. I don't quite understand how, but I hope to get more information next week at my first specialist appointment.

Well I guess one thing that is good news, is we had a great visitor in May. Well two. My Aunt Karen from Michigan and her friend Katrine came and we hung out and had a great time playing Nintendo Wii. My Uncle David came and along with Andrew and my father, built a new railing for our poor dilapidated steps up to the front door. It looks just wonderful. And Andrew and I decided to buy a Wii, as we have figured we do not spend enough "fun" time just goofing off and relaxing and playing. So, we thought a Wii would be a good way. Get the sports/competitive side for Andrew and in a way that I even enjoy playing!

Well, am waiting to board another airplane to head home. Hopefully I'll have more news to report, but good news soon!

More Interviews!

Well, in a rather more optimistic and positive post than the prior one (Sorry! I was having a bad day. We all have bad days every once in a while!) we have some more good news! Per my wonderful husband's request, I am very proud to say that we have since had requests for 2 more interviews since the one with Independence! Yay!! One was a phone interview with a small school outside of St. Louis. Not sure how they got our name??? But whatever, it was still a request for an interview! We aren't too hopeful for that one honestly, we really really don't want to move, especially not to St. Louis. Having both lived there for a period of our lives, we have no desire to go back! The 2nd is with the Grandview school district here in KC! For a 4th grade position. Yay! It will take place next Tuesday, so all prayers are gladly received. I'm so proud of him! If calls keep coming in like this, he will have secured a teaching position in no time!

Oh, in other not so positive news, I'm sure many of you have heard of the storms that came through the Kansas City area last week. Andrew and I had our moment of time in the basement as a tornado was thought to be heading directly for an area in the middle of my parents house and mine! It could have gone either way, and both my mother and I were wondering whose house who would end up at that night! Thank goodness, it lifted and the storm lost it's rotation a few minutes before it was in our area. Then a second round of storms came through overnight, these were even more powerful than the first round. During that round, there were two reports of tornado's on the ground in the KC area. One area not covered by the news (possibly because I don't think the tornado was quite on the ground by this time) that was damaged was our church! We sustained some roof damage, but thankfully no one was hurt and all the damage will be fixed in a week or two. God was watching out for us for that one!

So that's our news! Love to you all

Mondays

Ever have one of those days that make you just wish you could crawl back into bed and not ever get up? Ever wish you could just snap your fingers and everything would just be better?

I'm going through one of those moments, well it's been longer than just a moment. I do know that your attitude can make all the difference in the world when you are in an unhappy situation. The problem is, I don't know how to change my attitude. It's like I am completely incapable of reversing my thought process regarding this situation. And all I want to do is scream and just give up. But unfortunately for me, I'm a fighter, and I can't just give up. Even when every fiber of my being says to just throw in the towel. I hate feeling this way. I hate feeling so helpless. I hate feeling so confused.

Rambling thoughts while on a plane

I know the following post is going to break all the rules of blogging, but oh well. I just sort of let my mind and thoughts go as I was flying home yesterday from the Exponential Conference. I learned a lot that I am excited about putting into action. Well, here are my thoughts:

I am not really sure what I am writing for or about. I just know that I feel like writing. Unusual, huh? It's been said that I do it well. I pray that it is true, as I want to be able to use it to further God's kingdom.

I wrote in an earlier post about who I am. I realize now that it really was misnamed, as it really focused on whose I am. I See that know. I know beyond a doubt whose I am, I have yet to discover who I am.

I just finished attending the Exponential Conference and even though I was rather disappointed in the closing, I learned a lot. And I was excited several times about what is to come, and the role that I may ply in it. I was also surprised to find that the excitement came, not in the music possibilities it may present me, but in the written and communication challenges that may be to come. I find myself excited about the possibility of entering the world and searching for those in need of Christ. I am excited about being truly free to be who I am in Christ and to show the world who does not know him, that it is ok to be you! And be Christian! Do I have to still die to self? Yes! Yes, I do, but in dying to self I am dying to my wants! To my plan, my design for my life. But not to who I am, to my passions, to my strengths, to my personality, to my interests. See, that is the fundamental difference. I am not loosing myself at all, but I am loosing the unhealthy and very human desires of following the crowd!! Of following money, of following things, of following careers. See non of that matters, truly. Who cares if I am the CEO of a company with gobs of money and a fancy car and the biggest house in town! or if I live in a small shack, working for the smallest of incomes and can barely get by? God loves me the same. Christ died for me still! God raised Him from the dead so that I might live. Don't you see? All of that really doesn't matter! I don't care any more if I become the biggest thing out there. I just care that I live my life to the fullest by fulfilling God's purpose for my life.

Now I'm not entirely sure what His purpose is for me, but I am sure that I will find out as I move down this path. I will fail along the way. Many times, I'm sure. But do I care? No. God loves me despite my failures.

Thank you Lord, that I do not need to live up to societies standards to be accepted by you.

Who am I?

So who am I? This is a question that I have long struggled with. So here is what I know.

1. I am a child of God.
2. I am a wife
3. I am a child of human parents
4. I am a sister
5. I am a musician

The central idea in my life, the central belief I have, is that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, that he died and rose for my sins, and through the Grace of God I am assured of ever lasting life.

Maybe I don't tell you enough. Maybe I'll offend you for saying it. The fact is I don't know how to say it. I believe and pray that through the relationship you have with me, you will see it. And hopefully you will ask. If you have ever wondered, now you know. What keeps me going in this life is the knowledge that God loved me enough to do for me. That He would rather die than to ever live without me. All that I am, all that I do, is defined by this knowledge.

What is my point in posting this now? I don't know. Does it really matter? I guess I just felt like saying it.

Love you all.

Interview 1 down! And audition?!?!

So Andrew had his preliminary interview today. It really was just about 30 minutes long, and they asked him pretty standard questions, like what new educational trend would you implement in your classroom, and the like. According to Andrew it went, "Ok." And coming from him, that's a pretty glowing report, lol! It means good stuff! So now we are just waiting to hear back. I guess the next step is that they will put his answers into a database and as principals find or have open positions, they browse this database and look for matches. So hopefully we should be getting a call, although they did say that nothing would come really until the end of April. So thank you for your prayers for him today! We are looking forward to the next steps on this process and are very excited to see where this will go.

Now, my news? I'm terrified out of my mind! We recently completed a Bible study based off of the book by Erwin McManus, Chasing Daylight. And Chasing Daylight studies one section of Jonathan's life, particularly the time when he goes in to fight the Philestines with just himself and his armor bearer. And the whole concept is to seize your divine moment and step out in faith. If you hear God telling you, or just think this is where God wants you to go, go try it and see where it takes you. You may fail, you may be wrong, but at least you did SOMETHING to try to further God's will. So I am stepping out in faith. As many of you may know, I have a passion for singing. I've sang in the contemporary group at my church for the last 3 or so years now, and have sang chorally and in solos from the time I was in the 4th grade. So it's something I've been doing for years and just love it. I can't imagine my life now without somehow being involved in some sort of music ministry. Soooo, the other day I was sent a posting on Craigslist, looking for a female Christian vocalist and I applied. YIKES. This person is looking for a lead female vocalist to sing some of his songs he wrote personally for a few gigs that he has coming up throughout Kansas City, and even one in Iowa. I am one of 4 people he is meeting with. And let me tell you, I am shaking in my boots. I have no real nervousness anymore singing in front of my small congregation, I'm used to them, I know them. I also get a strong sense of comfort from working with the group that I always sing with. We know each other pretty well and support each other and we all think the other is talented, etc. So now I'm stepping out into territory I have not charted since high school. All I can say is AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Ok hopefully that will take my nervousness out, lol! So please pray for me tomorrow that I have confidence and sing with the knowledge that I can do this, and that God will be with me and give me His strength. I think I'm more afraid that I'll actually get chosen and will have to sing in front of a wider audience than I'm used to, lol!